Am I addicted to the combustion engine?

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It is funny how much driving I do for someone who does not own a car.

I am just coming down off a stint of having access to a Ford Mustang followed by a short getaway weekend with a Hyundai Accent.  ( I mean in a Hyundai Accent.)

I am not sure if it is a product of the time and culture in which I grew up or the fact that my father is a “car boy”, but I have to admit something. I really love cars.

Now before you get your tie dye hemp shorts in a twist, I don’t mean that I wouldn’t rather drive some super clean futuristic zero emissions perfect car. I don’t think those exist, yet. But there is something beautiful about a well designed car, a powerful engine, steering that handles well and the connectedness of a manual transmission. Cue great music pumping out of the [insert the car of your dreams]. Isn’t it the quintessential American symbol of freedom and independence? Interesting.

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So, yeah, I think I might be addicted. When people ask me how the “car-free” thing is going, I sometimes have to feign excitement. Or if I am feeling particularly desperate, I give them puppy dog eyes and sigh. “It’s okay. Hard, sometimes.” Secretly hoping that they will say, ‘Can I park my car in your driveway while I am traveling? And be sure to drive my car as much as you want while I am gone.’ (This actually is how it went down with the Mustang.)

The more time without a car, the more okay I am with not having one. But once I sip a taste of that quick movement with minimal physical effort, I am hooked.

I liken it to my challenge with sugar consumption. The polite term is – I have a sweet tooth. A more accurate account would be that I am a strung out sugar junkie.  For example, I decided to give up sweets for 21 days or the month of September ( which ever came first). You can see that we are already dealing with the illogical mind of addiction. So on day 20, I had a concert at my house and prepared some desserts for my guests. I caved that night and enjoyed a taste of each of the two desserts. It was a huge accomplishment for me to get that far. And I haven’t totally binged out, but I have noticed an incremental creep of sugar back into my diet. Perhaps, I need to go to a SA ( sugaraholics anonymous) meeting.

Back to the question about car addiction.

I just dropped off the Hyundai with Zach at the car rental place. I felt a little twinge in my heart as I parked in the lot. Scanning my brain, is there anything else I need to do with a car before I let you go? Grocery store? Heavy items to buy?  The withdrawal symptoms set in  as I tightened the laces on my running shoes to run home.

A little panic followed by wondering when I might get another hit.

‘No car, today.’ I sigh to myself. There is no option to go the lazy route and skip biking my kid to her dance class. No leisurely drives to run errands I could totally do on my bike. Or longer trips that I definitely couldn’t do on my bike now out of reach. Back to local living.

Look, I want to be the bike mom hero. I totally do. Going cold turkey again today. Deep breath… I am thinking maybe I should start a chapter of CA ( car-aholics anonymous).

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